Book Review
Relationships: A mess worth making
Reviewed by Karen Dornan
29th June 2021
As part of my recent studies in Biblical Counselling, I read
‘Relationships: A mess worth making’ by Timothy Lane and Paul Tripp. I found it a very insightful and helpful book personally as I looked at the different relationships in my life and how I respond in the midst of the challenges, conflict, and joys that relationships bring. If you are feeling challenged after Thomas’ sermon on being a distinctive church, devoted to one another, I would highly recommend you take time this summer to read this book and explore what that can look like practically for us all.
So many of us settle for superficial, safe relationships but as Thomas challenged us to consider “Does that show we are truly loving as Christ loved us? – No, probably not!”. There are many problems which plague our close relationships and how we respond to these problems show the state of our own hearts. What is truly in our hearts is what drives our reactions, choices, and behaviours. This book explores how we transform our own hearts and shows us what God’s plan is for every relationship we have, and how He steps in to help build relationships that are all He intended them to be.
At points I found this book challenging and unsettling to read as they tackle disturbing truths that can dominate our thinking and behaviour, highlighting that we are all broken people in broken community experiencing the reconciling grace of God.
A few of the areas that are covered in this book include: why we should bother with relationships, our sin, our agenda for relationships versus God’s agenda, how we deal with conflict, forgiveness, how we carry one another’s burdens, and the hope we have in Christ, to name a few.
One of the chapters I found most challenging, encouraging and humbling was the chapter on Mercy. It explores what it means to be truly merciful to others and all that involves but also as we extend mercy to others, we cannot help but be confronted by how much we need God’s mercy. In our struggle with sin, we all need compassion, sympathy, forgiveness, and rescue.
Yes, relationships are messy but through them God shows us our inability to love others without first finding our strength in our relationship with God who created and redeemed us.
Prepare to be challenged but I can guarantee that if you apply this book personally it will make a major difference in your life and in the lives of everybody that you love. Are you prepared to start transforming our community and relationships by first examining your personal walk with Christ?
Relationships: A mess worth making is available to buy from 10ofthose.com
Click here to buy it online.
If you don't shop online, then Liz Rodger will happily order a copy for you.
And if you'd love to read this but money is tight, please just let Liz know and she'll order you a copy as a gift from the church.
Karen Dornan, 30/06/2021